Monday, March 21, 2011

Roach Slayer Supreme

Warning this contains a Fffing huge wall of text with strange and disturbing content.


I from hearing a word about cockroaches from 3-4 blogs, I felt like I should blog about it., I think my parents are bad at finding a decent apartment or for the moneys worth but its not. In the first apartment when I was a child was an infested with roaches and mice, they can be reported from about all apartments. I even went there once for nostalgia it's a depressing place with cracks on the walls, the stairs was full of piss, I think there was graffiti, the hall ways have strange doors on the first three floors(steam room, storage, etc) all so the building is on a hill so that's why its strange each floor had uneven lengths in the hallway. I even went to the apartment door I use to live but there was a cleaner on the floor so I didn't enter the hallway.No wonder when I was a kid I can imagine strange mysterious and nightmarish stuff(but the area had interesting stuff to look at).I guess I have some good kind of memory(in general) to remember the door numbers of the places that I use to live but, I forget the phone numbers and buzzer code.

This nifty thing over here that was pilfered f from HHH uses, it also makes things less big!





It begins I use to see these criers crawling all over the place as a child it didn't bother me much the roaches also like to poo in the VHS tapes and some corners of stands. My parents use poison dust in the corners and some poison chalk dust that use to work in that place but there was many of them (not an insane amount at the same time lucky me). The mice in the first place wasn't extreme but, they are there and they got in some sticky traps same with the roaches.
The second place was better but that place too was infested (plus my infestation) but it was not bad apparently when I moved out they were able to exterminate them. So that was the time when I was a child growing up and I started to get feed up with the roaches.


I had that rush and sensation that light had in death note (that pleasure).

Well the new generation of roaches are harder, better, faster, stronger because the crappy powder and chalk doesn't work and, they are more nocturnal. So every night I turn off the lights wait about 10 minutes then they are all out scuttling all over the kitchen, then I grab my blunt weapon or use hands or feet and, squash them I aim for the females first if I have the chance(not a misogynist joke or any thing) because, they run really fast and I don't like to find empty eggs in the corners. What made me feed up with them is they were able to infest my toaster oven so I burn them in side of it and watch them squirm and burn to crisp and some are fast enough to escape and they get smashed. They even got inside my refrigerator well it was crappy too it wasn't that strong but at least the freezer can freeze, so every time I open the fridge I find them running and some drown in my juice pitch so I have in mind I'm eating some thing a roach has crapped on and walked on if they can go through the seal.
I have even chopped  their heads and watch them run around I even chopped off a corner of their body and they can grow it back its like dragon ball z! I force them to drown and force them into sticky traps too its not a pretty sight when you catch about 20 of them and they are struggling to move. I use the sticky to catch a mouse just in time after that I messed around with it too like taping it to squeal and I dropped it from the 7th floor out the window then go outside the next day and find the dead mouse with flies with a smug look on my face. The roaches all so have some thing going on were they are on the ceiling or wall and they know, that I know there are there so when I turn around and spot them they drop and run (they can sense my bloodlust). I guess I have hunter senses because any thing that moves and something that's faster my eyes will follow it, so this is were I got most of my fast reflexes from other then game and goalie reflexes. I accidentally chewed a roach too it suffocated in  bag of raisins. That's the stuff I eat when there is noting and usually noting I was snacking on my raisins and then I was like what is the crunchy sensation in my mouth and, I found out it was a female roach it's didn't bother me I just spat my chew and gave myself a rinse. I have found out why some times when I wake up my nose is blocked, I dig my nose and found a dead baby roach.

That was one of my forms of entertainment when I had no cable and I did use to go outside a lot but the friends I made were crappy because 90% of them are all faggots, douche bags, manipulative and, they like to make me look bad. Then of course gaming all day at home if I have the chance yes I did also use to play the same game more then once not because I like it but it had better replay value that's why till I get the next game.
Also side note don't feed pigeons on your veranda(my dad did that) they will show their gratitude with poop and babies. Ya I killed chiclets once by accident because they fly away from their nest from predators so the babies are cold.


I think I should add trying to make crazy music as one of my goals circus music is a good start I guess.

At least we moved out a few months after the messed up fridge. That's when I got the poison spray can I went crazy with that hing I think the fumes can cause a strange effect. When I was moving I was a teen, after moving thouse boxes and find more roaches I gone on a killing spree. When the roach gets poisoned they do a dance and move around like crazy then die it was amusing. Yes I moved to a pest free area but 'm infested at least it didn't spread because I had the poison can and this cool apartment has crappy heat insulation so most of them they died and, the fridge was better so they can't take it over.

Then the next area the same case presently crappy heat insulation if I don't use extra heat my limbs gets cold and I will get sick. At least they finally died off it took me 18 years so I have made over 1000 kills on cockroaches in before roaches and stealing gave me horrible karma up to this day.

4 comments:

  1. >My short term memory is kind of wanky

    Yeah, mine too.

    >What made me feed up with them is they were able to infest my toaster oven so I burn them in side of it and watch them squirm and burn to crisp

    Fucking hell, man. I laughed. A+

    >I have even chopped their heads and watch them run around I even chopped off a corner of their body and they can grow it back its like dragon ball z!

    And again!

    >I accidentally chewed a roach too it suffocated in bag of raisins.

    You're pretty gutsy.

    when I wake up my nose is blocked, I dig my nose and found a dead baby roach.

    Damn, man. That's the stuff of nightmares.

    >At least they finally died off it took me 18 years so I have made over 1000 kills on cockroaches

    Roach conqueror achievement.

    It sounds like you have a real roach problem. I only occasionally spot roaches, but for some reason they seem to the huge garden kind. Every single time.

    To my knowledge, there is only one mouse in the house. I don't mind it too much, it's almost like a pet nowadays.

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  2. "I use the sticky to catch a mouse just in time after that I messed around with it too like taping it to squeal"

    Why the fuck would you do something like that? Don't torture it, damnit. :/

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  3. >Well the new generation of roaches are harder, better, faster, stronger

    Your poison dust must have selected for evolved hyper-resistant super roaches. Or something like that.

    >I accidentally chewed a roach too it suffocated in bag of raisins.

    Oh god. I'm not sure if I'd have been able to just spit it out and keep going (I think there's a fair chance I'd throw up).

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  4. That was especially disturbing for me since I'm EXTREMELY terrified of roaches. ;_;

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